I have been spending some time pondering about what to do with every task assigned.
- Continue doing, with complacency.
- Just let go of it.
- Do it no matter how bias the time is.
I have been repeatedly, consciously persuading myself to not give up and take the line,” This is your role/duty.” as a guidance. Some matters, I succeed, others I did badly. Well, this is life after all, you may not get what you want. Every night, before going to sleep, I will spend time reflecting for that day. Throwing questions at myself, questions which I couldn’t answer at times. I tried asking myself, or rather forcing myself to “ Stay Focus” and “do not slide off the tracks”, yet I realise, I have to repeat it over and over and over and over again. ALLAHUAKHBAR. Almighty God. Guide me the way. Amin. I have dreams, goals, that I want to achieve. I have problems to face, packed schedules and etc. I asked myself, how do I make a balance between everything in life? Oh, I nearly forgot, the words, Imperfection is normal. Abah (“Dad” in Malay) constantly encourage me to be strong. He gave me analogies, after analogies of successful people, he gave me hope, he gave me questions that made me thinking soon after, he provide me with books which may help me in balancing life, he is one that wants to take up courses to enrich himself with the updated knowledge. He is one of the few, that made my life better. Thank you Father, your presence have made an impact on my life.
Jiwaku berasa lebih kuat berbanding daripada dahulu. Aku mahu kekuatan ini digunakan untuk pelajaranku. Aku mahu mendapat keputusan yang cemerlang, keputusan yang akan membuat diriku, keluargaku bangga. Tidak, aku bukan seseorang yang sombong, angkuh terhadap sesuatu kejayaan. Tetapi, tidakkah seseorang akan berasa puas atas pencapaian yang telah dapat digenggam?
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Aku pasti kembali. Kau peluk aku, kau cium dipipiku, kau bilang jangan, aku pergi, pujuk rayumu, buat hatiku sedih, tapi ku hanya, dapat berkata, aku hanya pergi untuk sementara bukan untuk meninggalkanmu selamanya, aku pastikan kembali pada dirimu, tapi kau jangan nakal, aku pasti kembali.